Darkest night... HE WILL LIFT YOU UP!!!

Have you ever sat alone completely consumed by a single thought? Asking yourself time and time again, why is this happening to me? I sit here tonight with a heart that is so burdened and broken for a family that I grew up knowing. Last week, Tessa was admitted to the hospital and tonight she is struggling, fighting for her life. Her family I'm sure has cried countless tears, cried out to God, questioned God, and sought answers for why their family has been faced with such a difficult fight.

Tessa's life is in the palm of God's hand tonight. I sit here wondering will God restore her strength, or will He call her home? Only God knows. I can't imagine the pain and heartache her family is facing. I have talked to so many friends that know Tessa and we all have the same response, how could this happen... she's so young. We have all been reminded we aren't promised tomorrow. We've all said that we take everything for granted. We complain about a bad day at work, we complain about a little cold or runny nose, our kids being cranky or a messy house, we even complain about sitting in traffic. We complain about the smallest of small things. In the grand scheme of things our day to day problems are a tiny grain of sand compared to what Tessa and her family are facing tonight. I'm sure her family would give anything to have her sitting around the kitchen table, kids running around like indians, or waiting for her to meet them for dinner because she's stuck in traffic. Those things that were once huge in our daily grinds, are nothing compared to the battle they are facing tonight.

The doctors and family don't know if Tessa will pull through her illness or not. She has an infection in her blood. I came here in hopes that those of you that follow my blog and believe that our God is still working miracles, pray for this young wife and mother, daughter, sister, and friend. Please pray for God's will to be done. If it is His will, I ask that He heal Tessa and allow her to go back home and enjoy each and everyday of her life with her family. Let the trial that she has faced be a vivid reminder to each of us, young and old, that the material things of this world mean nothing. It's the relationships we hold dear to our hearts, the giggles of our children, the moments we spend doing for others that really mean the most.

I have tried and tried to think of words to send to the family to show my love and support and I just can't seem to find the right ones to send. I do, however, have a song that I'd like to share with them. It's called, "Everybody needs a little" by Kari Jobe.

Come all ye weary and ye broken
Come to the table of the Lord
Come sing the song of the forgiven
Come lay your burden on the Word

Come and find
Peace everyone needs a little
Rest everyone needs a little
Joy and a song to sing in the darkest night
Life even when it gets you down
Hope will turn it all around
But love is the greatest of these
Everyone needs a little

Sing all ye saints and ye sinners
Call upon the mercy of the Lord
Come sing the song of redemption
Sing about the hope that is to come

He will lift you up
He will lift you up higher than sorrow
He will lift you up
And cover your soul with healing



***Please scroll all the way down the page and pause the music player on the side bar to listen to the song below***

To Tessa and your family, it is my prayer tonight that you find peace, rest, joy, and a song to sing in the darkest night. I can promise you that just in the last week Tessa's life has touched so many of us and shown us that we need to live each day as if it were our last. We need to say I love you and not assume that there's tomorrow. We need to laugh and not argue. We need to come together and not push apart. We need to cherish every moment, and even in our darkest night... we have the promise that God will lift us up, higher than sorrow, and cover our soul with healing. 

If you are reading this, it's not by chance. Please take a moment and pray for Tessa. The power of prayer is unbelievable. I also ask that you examine your own life and ask yourself, if I were faced with dying today would I be ready to meet Christ?  Have you had a time in your life that you accepted Christ as your personal saviour. If not, what better time than now.  It's an easy prayer, one that will change your life forever.  

I thank each and everyone of you that will pray for Tessa. If you do, please leave a comment so the family sees the support and can read your words of comfort. Thank you.

Blessings to you all....

A touching story

Do you ever read something that just over takes you? Are you ever touched by something someone else is going through? I guess what I'm trying to say is tonight as I was reading through new blogs that I've discovered today, and keeping up with the latest Facebook updates, I was moved. I went to a link about a little girl named Layla. As I read the story, I could feel the mother's pain for her child. I could feel the fear, the sense of helplessness, and the love she had for this sweet child of hers. I was moved to tears. My heart ached, and still aches for a family that I don't even know.

I'm going to be very honest tonight, as a reminder to myself. I've discussed that I have whirlwind days around here, days that I feel I accomplish absolutely nothing. This year alone has been trying going from having one child to two. We've had colic, we've had just pure out grumpiness, but that doesn't matter. I've had days that I long for nap time, I long for quietness, but I have to stop doing that. I have to stop worrying about the dust, the laundry that's building mounds, and quit wishing nap time would come sooner. My children will only be this size once. They'll only need me this much for such a short time in their lives. I worry about things that really don't matter. It is my prayer tonight that God will show me even on my toughest of days that the whining, or the crying, the messes, whatever it may be that day are blessings. I pray that I find a calm, and a way to enjoy the times that normally make me want to pull my hair out. All to often, I lose it. I get frustrated when I really shouldn't, and I need reminding that I can't stress the small stuff. I say this to say that I've been praying to God seeking a way to be a better mother. A more calm, laid back, go with the flow mom. I want to be a mom that my boys enjoy... everyday!  I don't want them to remember a mom that yells or constantly says no, or has too many 'un-necessary' rules (come on, you know what I'm talking about).

Tonight when I clicked on Layla's story and read the words her mother had written there was no doubt in my mind that God led me to that blog. He led me there to show me that I have so very much to be thankful for. I have healthy children. That alone is one of the greatest blessings I could ever have. I take so much for granted. So what that Tucker's cutting his fourth tooth this week, had diarrhea, and a low-grade fever. This week I thought I was going to lose my mind at some points. He wouldn't let me put him down, he only wanted me. Looking back now, I'm ashamed of myself. I'm ashamed that I take for granted that he's waddling up and down the hall, dragging toys from one room to the other, or spilling milk or cookie crumbs on my freshly mopped floors. He's healthy, so why am I complaining? I hate to admit I watched the clock for nap time. How dare I?  How dare I not want to spend every waking moment listening to their sweet voices? I prayed for these children, and now I pray for nap time?! How absolutely ungrateful do I sound???  These are all questions I've been pondering since I read this story.

Tonight, this mother that I don't even know has reminded me that holding my boys is the most important thing on my to-do list for today, tomorrow, next week, and three months from now. Playing Hi-Ho CherryO for the tenth time is what really matters. Layla's mother dreams of having 'those' days back. Sweet Layla has been diagnosed with cancer, and she is really struggling with it now. This family, like all of us, is not promised tomorrow with Layla. They are living their lives minute by minute, second by second. I'm not promised tomorrow with my boys. I have to live each day as if it were their last. I can still be their "Momma" and have rules, but I must let go of the little things. Their giggles won't sound this way forever. Their cries, won't last forever. The chaotic evenings will soon be a thing of the past. One day I'll stand within these four walls and dream of having the noise, the ruckus, the busyness back in my life. Just moments ago, Carter says, "Daddy, can I just sleep in your room on the floor?  I only have two mommy and daddy days (a.k.a Saturday and Sunday)" I would usually say no, you need to sleep in your room. Not tonight. He's in our room lying on the floor watching Swamp Loggers. If those are the little things that he'll remember, then so be it. Times are changing around here, you here me?!

Lord, forgive me. Forgive me for not enjoying each and every moment that You have given me with Carter and Tucker. Forgive me for wishing days away, or wishing for the peaceful days of my past. Change me Lord, make me into the mother You would have me to be. Let me be a mother that doesn't wish the day away. Teach me to be more compassionate, and understanding on the days when they need me more then most. Thank You for this sweet family that is battling cancer with their young child. Give them comfort, peace, and strength. I pray that You wrap Your loving arms around them and let them know they are not alone. Carry them, may their hearts never lose the joy they've shared with Layla. May their final days with her be peaceful. We don't understand why cancer strikes, Lord, but we know you are in control. I pray that through this little girl that Your love will be shown. I pray that you bless this family even in their extreme time of need. I thank you that I came across their story, because it has changed my heart.   Amen.




I don't have a huge number of followers, but it's not about numbers. God doesn't care how many there are, He just cares that we all come together. I ask each of you that reads this post tonight to keep this dear family in your prayers. I am proof tonight that you do not have to know someone to be touched by their story, or to pray for them. If this story has touched your heart tonight, please visit http://laylagrace.org/   and let the family know you are praying for them.  Thank you!

Jesus woke me up

A few nights back I was trying my best to talk Carter into staying in his bed that night.  He has really made coming to our room and sleeping a big habit.  So the other night I laid down with him and as we talked he told me he didn't like his room because he was scared.  I told him there was nothing to be scared of and he told me there were monsters & bad guys in his closet.  He said he didn't like being alone.  I told him we are never alone that Jesus is always with us and when we are scared we can talk to Him and ask Him to take away our fears.  He just grabbed my hand, closed his eyes and he was out.  

That night, he didn't get out of bed.  I think it was mainly because we put a clock in his room, and told him he had to wait for the alarm before he could get up.  It worked like a charm for several days.  Last night, it didn't work.  He was in our room around 3:00.  This morning I asked him why he got out of his bed and came to our room.  He replied, "It was Jesus Momma, He was waking me up and told me to come to your room!"  

Hmm... he's a sneaky little thing I tell you! ;)

Kids say the funniest things

I just have to catch myself sometimes when Carter says some of the stuff he says, so that he doesn't see me laughing.  Half of it is stuff he shouldn't say, and he does get reprimanded for it, but for that split second I have to turn my head and ever so quietly bust into laughter.  Lately he's been coming up with some of the funniest stuff.  It's like he knows the ever so perfect moment to say it.

Last Friday we went out to eat and then to Wal-Mart.  A pretty routine Friday night for us.  We turned on to 301 headed back into town and Carter started in with he wanted a new toy from Wal-Mart.  After cleaning, and picking up toys all week long the last thing I wanted to do was add another to the mix.  I told him that there would not be any toys he had more then enough at home.  Well, of course, this chapped him right off.  He started crying and nothing we said was going to make him happy.  Travis finally came up with the great idea that we would get him fresh boiled peanuts on the way home.  On our way home we got closer and closer to where the peanut lady should be and.... she was not there!  Oh heavens!  What should we do now.  This just sent him into another fit.  Once again, Daddy to the rescue picked up his cell phone and pretended to call the peanut lady.  He reassured Carter she would be there the next day.  Carter said, "Daddy, you promise we'll get peanuts tomorrow?  Call her back and tell her I want a water too!"  Seriously... was he putting in his order for peanuts and a drink??  Too funny!!  

On Saturday he spent the morning with Travis while I went for a pedicure with Paulette (my mother in law).  While we were there we received a phone call from Granny Vera that she had been in a car accident.  Luckily she is okay but her car, not so much.  She was pretty shaken up but is doing okay now.  When we made it to Granny's, Papa Joe being the jokester that he is, was saying, "Granny go up, and Granny go down".  Carter thought this was the funniest thing. As we were all eating lunch together and talking, Carter was at the small table behind the kitchen table talking to himself.  I turned around to see what he was saying and he was holding his hands up then down saying, "Granny go up, Granny go down!"  Then he would laugh.  It just amazes me that he was even paying attention when Papa was saying that.  

The best of all these cute little moments is the one Travis just informed me of.  Since I am no longer allowed to tuck Carter in at night (his choice, not mine), Travis is the one that gets that sweet pleasure.  When he tucked him in last night and they were saying their prayers Carter's went like this, "Thank you Jesus for Tucker, and momma, and Tucker's ninny bottles!!!!!!!"  Yes, you read that correctly, he thanked Jesus for Tucker's ninny bottles.  Now, for those of you that have absolutely no idea what I'm talking about, ninny bottles are what "I" feed Tucker with. Explaining to my three year old about breast feeding was not something I had put a whole lot of thought into.  Just a recap as to where this came from, when we came home from the hospital Carter was asking how I was going to feed Tucker.  I explained to him the best I knew how that I would feed him.  He wasn't getting it, so I asked him if he knew how the baby cows ate their dinner and he said yes, they drink ninny.  Well, my quickest thinking was to tell him that I too had ninny bottles.  This cured his curiosity and that was the end of it.  No more questions, that's just how it is.  It seemed easy enough to me at the time, but now that he tells me when Tucker cries, "Momma, he just wants his ninny bottles, feed him!"  When Travis told me that he said this while saying his prayers I thought I was going to die laughing.  It was hilarious and absolutely precious at the same time.  The innocence of a child, and the things that he is thankful for.  He also asked yesterday, "Momma, why does bubba cry all the time?"  Now there my friends is the million dollar question.  My response, if I knew son, he wouldn't be crying!! :)