Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Where are the days going?

This morning I had my routine check up. Everything is going exactly as planned still, thank you Lord! I am so blessed to not have any major complications, other then the normal wear and tear of pregnancy, LOL!!!

I dropped Carter off at preschool, and headed to the appointment. With Travis being in Canada, I decided that today I would record the heartbeat and send it to him in a text message. We all know that I'm not a 'technical' girl, so as I drove I scrolled through my phone figuring out the best way to go about this. I found the "my sounds" on my phone, which I forgot I even had. I pressed play on the first sound. As it started my mouth immediately dropped open. The farther the message went, the more the tears welled up in my eyes and started fall.

The message was of Carter sending his Daddy a hello message last year on his trip to Canada. His little voice, so small and squeaky. Following my every que he sent his Daddy a hello message which ended with "night da da da!" I was, and still am completely blown away at how much just his voice has changed in a year. When I started to type this, I decided to check the date of that message. Ironically enough, it was EXACTLY one year ago today! Talk about crazy!!

Last night I started a book called, "The Power of a Praying Woman". The book talks about how we keep ourselves so busy and on the go that we really forget to slow down and hear God. When we pray, we pray for immediate things, we pray for people that we know and don't know, or the normal 'watch over my family' prayer. Then it asked, when do you pray strictly for yourself, and for God to speak to your heart? As I pondered that, I made sure that when I prayed last night, that I asked God to speak to me. I asked that He slow me down, make me enjoy the little moments, and most of all to be a better mother to my child and a better wife to my husband. I asked that He let me not take for granted the days that I live. I will admit, and those that know me know, that I am easily frustrated, short tempered, and on edge a lot of times. I asked God to change those things about me, especially when it comes to being a mom.

I took finding that little message from my sweet baby boy, this morning, as God's way of telling me that the days are passing and things I'm fretting over are not nearly as important as the child(ren) that He has so graciously blessed me with. Just in one short year, my little boy has changed so very much. I'm with him everyday, but feel I've missed so much by trying to take on to many tasks, or keeping the house clean, and clothes washed. My mom has told me so many times that she would give anything in this world to have her three children under her heels, asking to play or to help with her tasks of the day. Today, I wish I could hit rewind and go back and just truly listen to his voice and etch each and every day in my memory forever. I suppose all mothers feel overwhelmed as I do today about missing something, or taking for granted the life we are living. As I have done in other recent blogs, I'm going to blame it on these pregnancy hormones.... but who am I kidding? It's God's way of telling me to stop...slow down...and just be.

I've played the message numerous times today, locked it on my cell phone so it can't be erased and I plan on using it as my daily reminder of what I owe to my little guy.
Love to all...

If you'd like to hear the message/clip that I'm referring to here is the link,

1 comment:

Mrs. Bell said...

how sweet,, you are soo lucky to still have that message.. Not that I have kids, but I think its normal to get carried away with all the busyness of life, but its great that you are acknowledging it, so now you just have to try your hardest to do better from here on out... Dont beat yourself up about it, you are a GREAT mother and you always will be... =)

I luv u