Change me

Do you ever feel out of the loop, out of sync, like you are just going through the motions?  I have a situation in which I'm trying to deal with and quite frankly, it's getting the better of me.  I can't come to terms with the decision that needs to be made.  I'm frustrated about the situation, and the more I think about it the more upset I become.  The thoughts of where is the fairness in this, or what am I supposed to do constantly run through my head.  I'm thinking about "me" and my feelings and how I'm going to have to deal with this.

Those thoughts bring me to this.... I heard a pastor preaching one day about trials that we face. We put too much thought and blame towards another person instead of keeping our mouths shut and praying.  Am I saying that you always need to keep your mouth shut, no.  I think you need to speak your part, work to an agreement, but never keep quiet just because.  I keep trying to look at the 'other' side of the situation but the stubborn part of me can't see anything positive.  I'm really struggling with this.  The message from the pastor said, if you are having difficulty dealing with a situation, a certain person, or whatever the case may be... maybe it's you who needs to be the one with an attitude adjustment (for a lack of better words).  One of his examples was this, if a woman is longing to be a mother and she and her husband have not been blessed with a child yet, that woman will find herself being envious of another woman who has found out she is pregnant.  His point was this, you have to love as God loves.  You have to show true sincerity, you have to really have a Christian attitude and outlook towards any situation you are given.  Sometimes if we are having a dispute with a family member, friend, or loved one we want to throw all the blame on that one person.  Is that right, UMM NO!  We are all sinners, and sometimes in all reality it's ourselves that need to be the one changing.  The pastor said to ask God to change your heart first, then ask Him to change the heart of the other person.  

Whoa!  Now, that (for me) is a lot to swallow.  I'm supposed to ask for a change of heart when I'm not the one throwing a kink in the plans?  God is showing me that just because my views are one way, doesn't mean it's His way.  I suppose my stubborn, bullheaded self needs to quit finding the negatives and just pray. God will work it all out, I just have to trust & have faith in His will.  It's much easier to get all huffy puffy about things rather then stopping and saying, God, change me. Change my take on this situation.  It is my prayer that God will open the doors that are needed at this time.  May He change my heart, take away my frustration and anger and let me see the good in it all.  

Are you facing a certain trial in your life?  If so, are you willing to let go and ask God to change your heart??